I called my friend Audwin The Black Belt the morning of March 18th, the day of Barack Obama’s speech, A More Perfect Union.
Me: Aud.
Audwin The Black Belt: What’s up man?
Me: Did you hear? Your boy is giving a speech this morning on race.
ATBB: Yeah.
Me: You know what this means right?
ATBB: Ummmm…
Me: It means were doomed!!!
ATBB: [...]

I was singing The National Anthem.
Loudly.
Why? Because it’s the National freaking Anthem!
“Please stop.” My wife said. “I have a headache and you’re singing too loudly. You’re making it worse.” “Silly wife.” I said, “Once again you’re confusing singing loudly with blowin’. I wasn’t giving you a headache because clearly, I can blow!” “No you can’t.”, [...]

I had to turn down the sound on CNN while I watched the returns on Super Tuesday because I can’t stand pundits. Mostly because they are annoying and dumb. The reason I know they are dumb is because I am REALLY smart. I rarely agree with anything pundits say, so ipso-facto, they are wrong.
And dumb.
They [...]

Michelle sent me an email with a link to this video.
Oh I’m sorry, you probably know her as Michelle Obama. I keep forgetting everyone isn’t on a first name basis with her, like I am.
Silly me.
We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics, they will only grow louder and more [...]