My wife was talking about the adolescent stage of development. She described it as a point in life where a person is very ego-centric but fails to accept responsibility for their own actions. It is the “everything happens to me” stage in life. She used her students as an example:
Student: Mrs. V., you gave me [...]

I am laying on the bed, staring absently at the ceiling. My wife is sitting on the edge of the bed with her laptop,
Me: Tricia.
Tricia: Yes.
Me: I was just wondering…
Tricia: Yes.
Me: …If you should give me a full body massage.
Tricia: Well let me tell you. That ain’t gonna happen.
Me (under my breath): What the hell [...]

I called my friend Audwin The Black Belt the morning of March 18th, the day of Barack Obama’s speech, A More Perfect Union.
Me: Aud.
Audwin The Black Belt: What’s up man?
Me: Did you hear? Your boy is giving a speech this morning on race.
ATBB: Yeah.
Me: You know what this means right?
ATBB: Ummmm…
Me: It means were doomed!!!
ATBB: [...]

You: Here you are. I’ve been looking all over the net for you!!!
Me: Huh…Wha?!
You: What the f*ck are you doing?!!
Me: Wha…I was taking a nap
You: For two goddamn months?!!, what the f*ck is wrong with you?!!
Me: Well there was the holidays… and then I got sleepy.
You: Get your ass up and get back to work. [...]

The setting is the dinner table. My daughter, Taylor is 9. My son Morgan is 7. My wife Tricia is 40.
Me: Who is this Steven you were talking about?
Taylor: He’s a boy at school.
Morgan: Yeah. He’s a boy who acts like a girl and he snaps his fingers in people’s faces. (He continues eating.)
Taylor: [...]